Friday, August 26, 2016

Rough Drafts, Sisters, and the Creative Process

flickr /  dvortygirl   

It’s an artistic thing, plain and simple, nothing more. I know that it is an artist thing and not just me . . .  I’ve read time and time again how artists will not share their work before they feel it is complete.  But it’s a family thing, time for a little compromise, ha, not a good thing, compromise, well at least when you are talking about the creative process.

There are reasons for artists not wanting to share their work with others until the art is in a phase of completeness. Which of course the artist’s work is never done. Yes, the time eventually comes, it is a time to let go, a time where the artist’s child must be stripped bare and meet the world and either be received with great fanfare, or a toast of mediocrity. Yes, it is a painful process that is accompanied by many a doubt, and fear, accompanied with strong hopes that it won’t be rejected. And yes for most artists we hang on longer than we probably should, we are driven with a certain sense of perfection, of completeness, always the nagging questions; Is that everything I wanted to say? Is that said the way I wanted to say it? Or even better yet, is it said in the best way possible? Is it too long? Is it too short? Is it too narrow or just a bit too wide? The endless nagging persists even when the time is complete and even when it’s still in development.

The reasons for not sharing work are countless, they are endless, sometimes fabricated and sometimes justified, but the major point is that they do exist. It is as integral to the creative process as the first draft or even the initial idea that even hasn’t had time to ferment.  It comes down to a certain ability of treating new creations as a possession. One that is held close, that is heavily guarded, a possession that is so valuable that it can’t be shared, it’s like the feeling when you bring home that brand new car home and your best friend asks for the keys. It is meet with the same type of hesitation, that overly protective sense of possession, but trust me it is so much stronger for a new piece of art than it could ever be for some silly shiny new car.  If we continue with the car analogy for a moment it will be easier to enlighten the non-artist to the way the artist’s way of thinking.  We are scared to hand over the keys for that new car for several reasons, our first thought, no what if they scratch it, what if they wreck it? What if I want to look out the window at it and it not be there?

                Even more so than the fear that our piece of art might receive a scratch on it, is the fear of letting go too early, it’s the best way to jinx a project. So it becomes necessary to stay clear of the unsolicited advice in order to protect the integrity of the work of art. A partial vision that is shared is only a partial vision, which may or may not look like the masterpiece that it will finally become, only time will tell. But therein lies the biggest dilemma, to share an incomplete vision is not to share a vision at all, but more of a revealing of an idea.  That idea, once it is shared, is forced to bend and sway to more forces than if it wasn’t shared at all.

What about that killing process where a decision is made that this big portion over here just doesn’t fit the whole, an independent observer may suggest to leave it, not to slash it to pieces often as an artist does. It is then that the creative process and the art itself would become damaged, scratched, or worse yet sabotaged or tainted. The piece of art is then doomed, paralyzed, permantly placed in a state of never achieving completeness, of never being done, of never being right

And those are the reasons my dear sister that you even tho you are family you will and must wait till the child is ready to be released into the world before you or anyone else can see it. 

Tuesday, August 16, 2016

Hi how you been, I’ve Been Scared


          Hi how you been.  Yea I know it’s been a while . . . but... I thought you should know I have been busy, but not too busy to do some writing, actually quite busy writing, probably still not producing what I’d like to be, but that whole job thing does get in the way sometimes. I know to the outsider it looks as if I have abandoned this blog, but I haven’t. I just temporarily shifted my focus and what a shift it has been. Soon I will be publishing a series of essays that I like to refer to as the five in five, in that I will be publishing five essays in five days, perhaps that is just a working title (catchy tho) for my writing portfolio that I’ve been working on for quite some time now. Maybe, “Shaken to the Core: A Writing Portfolio to Challenge Your Worldview” would be a better title, wouldn’t you say? The location of publication of said essays as of this writing is undetermined.    (If you don’t follow me on Twitter you probably should now (@muselinguis is my handle, convenient hey?) I will try to post information here too when that happens, but if you really want to be the “first to know” just follow me on Twitter, or heck even if your sub conscious will not allow you to do that then just bookmark my feed and refresh it ten times a day.

          So yea, it has been a while and I have been somewhat busy writing, but not so busy that I’m happy with the amount of production, or on most days the lack there off. I hope once this is posted that I don’t procrastinate and keep you hanging for too long. Cliffhangers are nice, but white noise for extended periods of time is something else that has no dramatic effect at all and just leads to forgetfulness.   The very last thing I want you to forget about is my writing portfolio that is coming soon, which will overwhelm your senses, challenge your thought patterns and hopefully shake your world view to the core.  After all who doesn’t need their world view to be shaken some times.

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So I find myself in a state of self psycho analysis once again, if you could know my private thoughts processes, you would know that I'm there a lot, heck if you even read my blog you might come to see how much I overly analyze every breath. (Ok maybe not every breath, but most of them.) Maybe I’m on the right path after all, wasn't it Socrates that said “the unexamined life isn’t worth living”?
          Regardless, the point I’m trying to get at is that I was trying to figure out why it has taken me six months of spare time work to get this done, when it could have been finished in half the time, then on top of it was the shut down as I call it, the point where for whatever reason I just stopped producing for a while, it was as if I shut down on all fronts. Perhaps I just needed a break. 

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          So my psycho analysis is nowhere close to complete on this one (so oh so much to analyze) , but when I’m able to pull a moment for myself from my conscience mind, I am then able to consider some of the facts. This here is what has been extracted from my consciousness so far . . .  Perhaps I just needed a break from the pressure I so often put on myself or . . .
          A more plausible explanation could have something to do with that article I read this morning about how hatting your job can be exasperating, and that can pretty much sum up how I feel on most days is exasperated  (what a word that is).  First I read it, then just thought so-so, but then I contemplated on it some, and then contemplated on it some more and considered how much truthfulness was there. Was my job actually killing me and my dreams? If so, then I really need to abandon any type of employment as an occupation or career goal.  It goes along the same lines of those in poverty and how studies have shown that those in poverty are so preoccupied with wondering where their next meal will be coming from, or how they are going to simply keep paying the rent, or worrying about their lack of health insurance.  They no longer have the mental energy to expend on getting out of poverty when they are cognitively spent on figuring out how to survive. Yes, a vicious cycle, and perhaps that is why I feel the way I do about my job, it is such a viscous cycle that still leaves me exasperated, and spent. It doesn't leave me with much energy to move my writing career forward to an acceptable position.  Seems plausible enough, heck almost believable until you look at the bigger picture, yes being exasperated from work has significantly limited my art, but not so much as I may have because . . .  I’m thinking perhaps I just needed a break from all the pressure I put on myself, or maybe I was just plain scared.

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          Gee I’m scared to admit to it. I have nothing left to blame but me myself. I am the cause of this lack of production. I became scared when I actually had a productive couple of weeks, enough production that my main project for the last six months was nearing completion, which means a lot of things: I’d have to find a new project (scary). I’d have to put the project out there for others to see (even more scarier).  It is simple to see how this could cause a shut down in production. So then, there is this contemplation of fear that has been brought to the surface, making it a situation that needs to be dealt with and not be ignored.
          When I first think of fear, I think of the word itself which can be intimidating of its own accord. Just the way the word sounds can invoke trembling in your boots, throw in the fact of it being used in a sentence that happens to be discussing your mental state and the sound of the word can be real intimidating. I mean first off who really wants to acknowledge their fears, and even when we do acknowledge their existence we don’t choose to deal, because we are scared to deal (great more fear on top of fear). Just the sound of the word, the mention of the word has the capabilities to invoke a spirit of fear.
          But it is in those times of acknowledgment that we may also get a glimpse of the impact that those fears have on our daily lives. And out of the shadow creeps all types of fears, fears that affect our relationships, and family. Fears that affect our social standings, fears that affect our cognitive abilities, fears that hold us back, fears that keep us from achieving all we were meant to be, fears that keep us from being successful in whatever our calling may be, heck even fears of living out that calling itself.

          So fear is an ugly, crippling monster that should not be subdued, that’s not good enough, fear must be destroyed, much like that awful dragon outside the castle, the only way to  really fix the problem is total annihilation. We shouldn't try to limit our fears, or even overcome as some say, I believe nothing less but total annihilation will do.

          . . . And if this is so my only option is to finish it and put it out there.

Now I have decided to overcome those fears and show the world my blog, call it a day view, if you will. Fear may have held me back ever so lightly, but also the fact that there really wasn't much to share except for a couple small days of rambling . . . But now there are more and more ramblings for your entertainment pleasure, enjoy, criticize, and interact with, it is the Internet after all.

Perhaps I just needed a break from all the pressure I put on myself, or maybe I was just plain scared, so my most logical action would be to throw my writing out there and let the world be my critique, don’t worry you can’t be any worse than my internal critic. So thus here it is my most recent blog post. So that’s what I’ve been up too lately, besides learning not to procrastinate, how to fight enormous distractions that are fighting for my attention every minute when I should be working, oh yea and been playing video games which I will never give up.  

Friday, August 12, 2016

What's A Muselinguis and Can I Find It In Pokémon Go?

flickr / Bureau of Land Managment
No not Moose-lings, it’s Muselinguis

I know, I know that’s the question everyone asks when I use my online identity. First they ask what is that, then a who is that, and then usually a what the heck? And then, who the heck again? It always ends up coming down to a why the heck?  So since you tuned in today, and hopefully other days too, I feel as if I might owe you some sort of explanation.

One Hundred Great Ideas

Besides the other reasons that I may cover here in a bit I would have to say why not? The domain name was available, which was a big plus because the other one hundred great ideas were already licensed. So I grabbed it when it was hot and when it was cheap, but that was just one of the reasons.

I wanted a name that I could brand. I definitely wanted something unique, something somewhat memorable, and something that could establish meaning, with a little bit of word play, and something that didn’t have twenty syllables, I don’t appreciate long names when it comes to domain names, or characters in video games. I feel the shorter you can make it the easier to say, easier to remember. Besides it is less letters to look at when your running down the road. So yes, I like short, maybe it’s a psychological thing since I’m physically shorter than average, but tall, very tall in statue.

So without using Latin, and just using a little bit of word play I could not only give Muselinguis meaning, but create my mantra which I believe communicates not only what I am, but what I want to become, when we pick it apart we get:

Muse - the inspirational guide that endows the receiver with a sense of creativity

Linguist – (yes I know this part is a stretch) a linguist is one who studies history of language, but if you shorten the word and remove the t and change the sound and cross your fingers really, really hard you can have it mean just words . . . or language, Heck it’s my domain name, I’ll let it mean whatever I want it too . . .

So if you stretch it just a little bit it is representative of my mantra for this writing life . . . which is simple . . . it is what I wish to provide to my clients, my publishers, and you my readers, it is simply this:

Muselinguis - Taking an inspired approach to the written word

So yep that’s my mantra, that’s what I hope to accomplish anytime I sit down to write. It is to be inspired in a heightened sense of creativity in order to reach out to others and inspire them, motivate them, make them think, challenge their norms, entertain and sooner or later in the process, I hope it’s even able to put bread on the table.

About the uniqueness . . . I struggled to keep it short, I really struggled on something that wasn’t used. . . but eventually settled on it. I wanted a name I could brand across several networks, uniqueness helped here; it is my Twitter handle, my Hub Pages handle, my Blogger handle, heck I even got a character in World of Warcraft that goes by that name. (Oh my what I nerd I am!) But hey, I guess it’s free advertising :)

Did I mention Pokémon Go?

     After all it’s all the hype now days, but I am so sorry on two accounts, the first is to the best of my knowledge there is not a Muselinguis in Pokémon Go, if there was though I would be honored. It would be awesome to have my digital persona represented in such a way that the world would stand up and take notice (interesting if I do it right I won’t even need Pokémon go to accomplish that).  A worthwhile goal . . . maybe someday. . . and the second account is I haven’t played as of yet, it’s scary after all I would have to go out and meet people, not this anti-social persona. Ok, the real reason is that I am somewhat of a gamer, or at least a game enthusiast, and when hearing of the addictive qualities of this game it scares me, it would most likely take over my life . . . I will admit thou that it is on my wish list in the app store, I hesitate every time I want to hit the download button. Maybe one day I will get brave and then I could even blog about my Pokémon Go adventures, kind of along the vein of John Steinbeck’s Travels with Charlie.

Did I mention it was on sale?

The best part of all this is that from this point forward you can choose to be smarter than the rest of the people you know because when you see this . . . #Muselinguis . . . You will automatically know what it means and where it came from, I’m not British but I just feel like wrapping this up with a cheers mate!